tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-75865740211762423272024-03-17T22:59:45.468-04:00Living This LifeWhat would happen if I gave up the "glamorous" world of New York City fashion and took a year off to figure out what I want to do with the rest of my life...?? Read on...Ziggyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08359008120255011866noreply@blogger.comBlogger67125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7586574021176242327.post-24213046556961895322012-07-18T06:53:00.001-04:002012-07-18T07:04:23.299-04:00Cry Me A RiverAt some point soon after, I stopped being able to cry. No more falling apart at the grocery store; I was cool, I was okay. I was numb and didn't know it, nor did I know it was normal.
After a short time had passed, this not crying upset me. "Something is wrong with me!", I would lament to my mother. "I want to cry, but I can't." When I finally broke down and bawledZiggyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08359008120255011866noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7586574021176242327.post-54742938644733560122012-07-18T06:41:00.001-04:002013-01-05T17:59:03.928-05:00The Truth, Too3 months to the day. I didn't plan this. I guess things have a way of turning out poetic sometimes.
Three months have never felt more like forever. I'm reminded of a song that goes -
"It's comin' round again,
The slowly creeping hand,
Of time and its command.
Soon enough it comes.
And settles in its place,
Its shadow in my face,
Puts pressure in my day:
This life, wellZiggyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08359008120255011866noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7586574021176242327.post-69928368413129619412012-07-18T06:24:00.004-04:002014-04-18T22:35:43.320-04:00That TimeI use the word April as if it can buffer me from reality.
"Yeah, I never unpacked my moving boxes because of what happened in April."
"Oh, it's all fallen to shit since April."
"Somethingsomethingsomething.April."
It's long been a tactic of mine. Because avoiding saying the real words makes them not real, and because being vague somehow lessens the pain. All the while knowing it Ziggyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08359008120255011866noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7586574021176242327.post-2405103838624443102012-07-18T05:56:00.001-04:002012-07-18T05:56:33.889-04:00The TruthI never knew it was possible to miss someone in this way. This much. I don't even know where all this hurt and pain come from. I didn't think my insides were that deep.Ziggyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08359008120255011866noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7586574021176242327.post-993445112934968382012-07-18T05:54:00.001-04:002012-07-18T05:54:35.313-04:00This MomentI swear I just saw your picture smiling at me. No, for real. It made me smile real big. Then it creeped me out for a second and I had to look behind me to make sure your ghost wasn't there. Then I admonished myself for being scared. Silly me. I walked into my room and closed the door.Ziggyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08359008120255011866noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7586574021176242327.post-25894655119050171202012-06-21T21:30:00.000-04:002012-06-22T04:24:30.660-04:00Mourning
(On April 18, 2012, we lost my younger brother Delmon Gabriel Aho to a sudden heart attack. Grieving is something I have never done before, not like this, and you are never prepared for death. I always felt blessed to have reached 30 and never have lost someone close to me. Little did I know that within a couple of years, that would all change. Sure, I had been to funerals, and some family Ziggyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08359008120255011866noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7586574021176242327.post-35278300883118508332012-06-18T06:03:00.001-04:002012-06-18T06:03:11.063-04:00Untitled IINo amount of flying will result in new dreams or new realities,
No depth of sighs or number a breath taken will bring him back.
He stays lonely and watching us,
Floating above.
Reproachful,
Accepting,
Forgiving,
Above.
No words written or words spoken,
No chests heaved and hearts broken,
No teared eyes or hot face,
No love lost or love gained,
Will bring him back.Ziggyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08359008120255011866noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7586574021176242327.post-41423581187783887072012-05-19T03:47:00.000-04:002012-05-19T04:01:00.911-04:00Untitled.
I spent, 30 days completely lost
In, 100 ways completely fogged
Thirty days
Dirty, crazed
Love me, try
My flirty ways
That,
Lead to being completely mazed,
So insane,
Completely drained.Ziggyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08359008120255011866noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7586574021176242327.post-27657803996830558632011-08-31T01:54:00.015-04:002012-03-12T03:16:32.715-04:00Easy-Peasy, Life Was BreezyOnce upon a time, life was easy. Or at least this is what I think now because at the moment, life is hard.
I moved to New York City at 23 with a dollar and a dream. OK, I had more than $1 but not by much. What I did have was drive and ambition. I had hunger. And I had optimism. The early years of relentlessly harassing people (in a nice way) so I could get my foot in the fashion industry Ziggyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08359008120255011866noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7586574021176242327.post-59674299208051368852011-07-21T20:51:00.003-04:002011-07-21T21:14:52.726-04:00Wordless Wednesdays: And On...Tortola, British Virgin Islands - March 2010Ziggyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08359008120255011866noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7586574021176242327.post-83702740395925890702011-02-22T07:31:00.004-05:002011-02-22T07:46:47.282-05:00Perfect Moment Monday: Peaceful MorningsPerfect Moment Monday is sponsored by Write Mind/Open Heart and is described as "...noticing a perfect moment rather than creating one. Perfect moments can be momentous or ordinary or somewhere in between." I think it's a great way to make us all more mindful of the good things that happen to us. There's always at least one perfect moment...!This week's Moment is as simple as they come, and I Ziggyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08359008120255011866noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7586574021176242327.post-2525140030321347822011-02-15T23:20:00.007-05:002011-02-16T00:04:43.423-05:00Perfect Moment Monday: MomentsPerfect Moment Monday is sponsored by Write Mind/Open Heart and is described as "...noticing a perfect moment rather than creating one. Perfect moments can be momentous or ordinary or somewhere in between." I think it's a great way to make us all more mindful of the good things that happen to us. There's always at least one perfect moment...!Moment #1: By the time I got home last night, I was Ziggyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08359008120255011866noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7586574021176242327.post-57838795371080243472011-01-27T21:55:00.005-05:002011-01-27T22:08:22.958-05:00Wordless Wednesday: Nature, NakedYale University; New Haven, CT - Nov 2010Ziggyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08359008120255011866noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7586574021176242327.post-18576976684195655532011-01-21T19:10:00.018-05:002011-01-21T23:53:14.696-05:00I Could Have...I could have been born anywhere, as anyone. I didn't have to be me. I could be living in an African village, playing in trash-strewn dirt streets, knowing little of the world outside of my immediate surroundings. I could have been born in Syria and never stepped foot in America, and I wouldn't have been part of a family known as mughtareebeen* every time I was introduced to someone new. I Ziggyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08359008120255011866noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7586574021176242327.post-90694979198410248142010-12-29T03:59:00.004-05:002010-12-29T04:06:14.868-05:00Perfect Moment Monday: I'll Be Home For ChristmasPerfect Moment Monday is sponsored by Write Mind/Open Heart and is described as "...noticing a perfect moment rather than creating one. Perfect moments can be momentous or ordinary or somewhere in between." I think it's a great way to make us all more mindful of the good things that happen to us. There's always at least one perfect moment...! I wasn't going to come home for Christmas this yearZiggyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08359008120255011866noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7586574021176242327.post-9358890161906031052010-12-21T22:19:00.015-05:002010-12-22T01:24:33.762-05:00Perfect Moment Monday: Island DreamsPerfect Moment Monday is sponsored by Write Mind/Open Heart and is described as "...noticing a perfect moment rather than creating one. Perfect moments can be momentous or ordinary or somewhere in between." I think it's a great way to make us all more mindful of the good things that happen to us. There's always at least one perfect moment...! As I walked out of the pharmacy, the word ISLAND inZiggyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08359008120255011866noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7586574021176242327.post-75814981706626557932010-12-03T21:59:00.008-05:002011-08-31T05:12:02.836-04:00Crash & BurnBad things happen when a person takes on way more than they can reasonably handle, and this is what has recently happened with me. In September I started 2 credit courses at FIT, started a weekly training regimen to get little miss Ciela in line, and started working again. I was also trying to research schools for a Masters program and stressing about where I should move. Add that to everyday Ziggyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08359008120255011866noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7586574021176242327.post-68334642637953059742010-11-25T00:41:00.004-05:002010-11-25T01:07:52.125-05:00Wordless Wednesday: WomanNY, NY - Oct 2010Ziggyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08359008120255011866noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7586574021176242327.post-3402348217744852102010-11-24T01:50:00.000-05:002010-11-25T01:19:19.570-05:00Perfect Moment Monday: LearningPerfect Moment Monday is sponsored by Weebles Wobblog and is described as "...noticing a perfect moment rather than creating one. Perfect moments can be momentous or ordinary or somewhere in between." I think it's a great way to make us all more mindful of the good things that happen to us. There's always at least one perfect moment...! The first week of September I had my first photography Ziggyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08359008120255011866noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7586574021176242327.post-55989658889065075832010-11-21T00:56:00.019-05:002010-11-21T02:59:45.158-05:00(RAW) Shit HappensI walked into the house and glanced at my laptop sitting on the kitchen table. My camera was connected and I could see what had been uploaded. I leaned in to read the dialog box that had popped up on the screen. "Noooooooooo!!" I shouted. "What happened!" my mom exclaimed from inside. My mom always thinks something disastrous has happened. Then again, I had just let out a blood-curdling Ziggyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08359008120255011866noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7586574021176242327.post-43626696035468279762010-10-22T02:32:00.007-04:002010-10-24T02:43:17.838-04:00Wordless Wednesday: Strength & SilhouetteNY, NY - Oct 2010Ziggyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08359008120255011866noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7586574021176242327.post-82603092916242482592010-10-13T23:45:00.001-04:002010-10-14T02:56:41.543-04:00Wordless Wednesday: PortraitsNY, NY - Oct 2010Ziggyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08359008120255011866noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7586574021176242327.post-14020242652033230362010-10-08T01:34:00.002-04:002010-10-08T01:46:48.490-04:00Wordless Wednesday: ObscuredGovernor's Island, NY - Sept 2010Ziggyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08359008120255011866noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7586574021176242327.post-34165282230225227472010-10-05T20:48:00.008-04:002010-10-05T21:41:49.716-04:00Perfect Moment Monday: Some Kind of Promise, Part 1Perfect Moment Monday is sponsored by Weebles Wobblog and is described as "...noticing a perfect moment rather than creating one. Perfect moments can be momentous or ordinary or somewhere in between." I think it's a great way to make us all more mindful of the good things that happen to us. There's always at least one perfect moment...!This week's PMM is going to be breif because I have to workZiggyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08359008120255011866noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7586574021176242327.post-77523039510826342282010-09-29T22:43:00.007-04:002010-09-30T23:01:23.288-04:00Wordless Wednesday: PerspectivaEl Rastro; Madrid, Spain - Oct 2009Ziggyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08359008120255011866noreply@blogger.com2